junior coder's experiment

from junior coder's experiment by allie

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lyrics

i think that i hate myself much more than you realize
confusing self obsession with love all the time

i hope there's a secret lesson in every experience
even if it's all one junior coder's experiment

so i sit
and i yearn
and i try to keep my mouth closed
as i think about why i try to control every outcome
of the choices debatably mine
of the choices debatably mine

i've got a habit of keeping you waiting upstairs
either my time is too precious or no one really cares
swinging back and forth from the poles of illusion and common sense
can you show me the difference between healthy debate and an argument?

so i sit
and i yearn
and i try to keep my mouth closed
as i think about why i try to control every outcome
in an age that's debatably mine
in an age that's debatably mine

my shoes are made of plastic and pain as i head to your door
i slither to your autumin hoping you forgot what i said before
but we both know you have a photographic memory
so i hold you in the light in hopes that it exposes everything

so i sit
and i yearn
and i try to keep my mouth closed
as i think about why i try to control every outcome
in this life that's debatably mine (x4)

credits

from junior coder's experiment, released March 6, 2020

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allie New York, New York

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